03 November 2011

@MTR1377AM @TodayTonight 31111


and that’s right
these resorts that they put the boat people in
it’s wrong when real Aussies
hardworking pensioners
not the dole bludgers
can’t afford to buy a digital wide-screen TV
apparently we need the government
tax payers money
our money
to buy set-top boxes for pensioners
this government is just so wasteful
and now they want to tax us even further
with a carbon tax
it’s as natural as oxygen, arsenic and uranium
it’s part of the natural order
and you can't see it
or taste it
you know these so-called carbon offset programs
involve planting trees
trees make oxygen
trees are made from carbon
no carbon, no trees, no oxygen to breath and burn
if there’s anything to this climate change thing
if carbon’s really involved
the tree-huggers should be thinking about all the extra trees
maybe they are
but they’re trying to blame it on us
without a shred of evidence
that the planet is even warming
because for the last decade it’s got cooler
and this government
all they can do is bend over backwards
to help queue jumpers and these undemocratic scientists
who seem to hold so much sway in Canberra
who voted for them
pushing this climate change lie
it’s all a watermelon conspiracy
you know
green on the outside
red in the middle
I recently heard a scientist say that they had nothing to gain
from pushing the climate change thing
that’s there’s no money in it
but’s that how they get their grants
tax payer money again
because these geeky science students
are poor
which really breaks my heart
and really highlights they’re agenda
the real reason for the climate change conspiracy
it’s all about lefty jealousy
it's student politics gone mad
and income for these professional students
who don’t like people like us
who can afford to put more carbon into the atmosphere than them
people like you and me
hardworking Australians
who turn our work ethic into a good life
a home, cars, air conditioners and wide-screen TVs
so you see it’s all a left-wing jealousy
that’s behind this climate change lie
and they try to confuse us by saying that science isn’t about common sense
that’s true

See also: TT's false facts fuel fear


  1. and others try to confuse us by saying that poetry isn't about facts


    that's equally true

  2. I recently spent a few weeks listening to too much MTR around the time of the carbon tax going through the Australian parliament. I was picking up, rightly or wrongly, on the language and arguments being used. You can argue for or against anthropogenic global warming on scientific grounds, as some do, or avoid the science and argue on ideological, party political and economic grounds, peddle myth and populist common sense, which is the view that I find most interesting in terms of language and logic. Also, the way that various issues come to be intertwined to form a whole world view. That's what this piece is about, using the kinds of terminology and views I heard on MTR, with a bit of satirical and poetic hyperbole thrown in.

  3. A typical trap that non-native speakers frequently step in - they get the actual words, but not the satire shining through.

    A fact is a true statement, like "this car is blue". But, what is the definition of 'blue'? Some might argue that it looks more like ultramarine or sky blue. Also, my comment didn't address the issue of science, or global warming, it was indeed meant literally: Poetry is not about facts. In a poem, the mind can be free, elephants can fly, but - it is imprisoned at the same time. "I am a well" - this allows room for various beautiful interpretations, yet a well will never be able to move. A metaphor, once chosen, can be a cage. Just like a fact. True freedom, therefore, can only be found in chaos and randomness.

    [I'm not trying to start a discussion, so I don't insist on publishing the post]


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